Name a reason a woman refuses to give her date a good-night kiss.
 

100

REEKS/BUTT BREATH

64

SHE'S MAD AT HIM

4

BAD DATE/NO MATCH

17

HE'S DRUNK

3

FIRST DATE/TOO SOON

6


ILL/ORAL GONORRHEA

6








Name something a man polishes until it shines.
 

100

HIS CAR/TRUCK

46

HIS GUN

2

HIS SHOES/BOOTS

43

HIS FACE/HEAD

2

HIS WATCH

4


HIS TOOLS

3








We asked 100 married men...
If you're smart, you've learned to lie to your wife about her what?
 

100

WEIGHT/FIGURE

45

EVIL MOTHER

5

PUKEABLE COOKING

25

BUTTERFACE

3

HAIR/COLOR

17


AGE/YOU'RE NOT OLD

5








We asked 100 married men...
Fill in the blank: My wife's bottom is so big, that at parties, we can ________ on it.
 

100

PUT DRINKS ON IT

26

SIT/LOUNGE

15

BOUNCE/JUMP ON IT

18

PLAY GAMES/DARTS

7

DANCE/LINE DANCE

17


EAT ON IT

17








We asked 100 women...
Name a part of your body that looks better lying down than standing up.
 

99

MY BELLY/FLABS

76

MY JELL-O ARMS

3

MY DROOPY D-CUPS

11

MY THUNDER THIGHS

2

MY FACE/JOWLS

4


MY RAT NEST HAIR

3








Name something a husband might find all over the bed that makes him suspect his wife is having an affair with a baker.
 

99

FLOUR

70

YEAST

2

SUGAR

10

DOUGH

2

BAKED GOODS/CRUMBS

10


ICING/FROSTING

5








Besides the top of your head, name something else you comb the hair on.
 

99

FACE/BUSHY BROWS

69

MY BACK

5

MY CHEST

8

MY LEGS

4

MY PET/DOG

8


MY BUTT/CRACK

5








We asked 100 married women...
Name something you might do and then say to yourself, "My husband's going to kill me."
 

99

SPEND MONEY/SHOP

60

CUT MY HAIR

3

WRECK THE CAR

21

STAY OUT LATE

3

THROW OUT SOMETHING

8


CHEAT/NIGHTLY

4








We asked 100 men...
Name something Tarzan does that you might like to do when you're on vacation.
 

99

SWING/ZIP-LINE

51

SLIP JANE MY BANANA

2

SWIM/SKINNY-DIP

29

RIDE AN ELEPHANT

2

WEAR LOINCLOTH

13


SLEEP/IN TREEHOUSE

2








If you had a pumpkin for a head, what would you worry someone might do to it?
 

99

SMASH/CHUCK IT

46

DRAW ON IT

2

CARVE A FACE

40

GUT THE SEEDS

2

COOK/EAT IT

6


LIGHT CANDLE

3








Name a sport where you see men with big bottoms.
 

99

WRESTLING/SUMO

43

GOLF

3

FOOTBALL

42

SWIMMING

2

BASEBALL

6


BOXING

3








Fill in the blank: A wealthy woman would hate to have someone mistake her new husband for her what?
 

99

SON

41

BROTHER

3

HELP/DRIVER

32

GIGOLO

2

FATHER

15


EX

6








We asked 100 women...
Name something you fantasize your handyman will do.
 

99

FIX THINGS/PAINT

41

WORK FOR FREE

6

CLEAN UP

21

DO ME/"TOOL TIME"

3

BE NUDE/SHIRTLESS

17


COOK FOR ME

11








These days, women are getting fat injections to give them buttocks the shape of what fruit?
 

99

APPLE

32

CHERRY

4

PEAR

31

MANGO

2

MELON/WATERMELON

20


PEACH

10








We asked 100 married men...
Name something you wish you could be honest about with your wife.
 

99

BUDGET/HER SPENDING

31

HER LOOKS/BIG BOOTY

12

SEX/YEARN FOR ORGY

21

HER HOUSEKEEPING

3

MY EX/STILL IN LOVE

19


HER VILE COOKING

13








We asked 100 women...
If your man were a stripper, which one of the seven dwarfs' names might his stage name be?
 

99

HAPPY

29

DOC

3

GRUMPY

27

DOPEY

3

SLEEPY

19


BASHFUL

18








We asked 100 married men...
Name something your wife would never let you bring to bed with you.
 

99

DOG/PET

26

COMPUTER

12

FOOD/PIGS' FEET

23

PHONE

5

A CHICK/UGLY ONE

20


MY SHOES

13








Name something done to a football you wouldn't want someone to do to your behind.
 

98

KICK/PUNT IT

58

SLAP/PUNCH IT

5

THROW/MAKE A PASS

11

GRAB/SQUEEZE/PINCH

5

DEFLATE/INFLATE IT

10


SPIKE IT

9








We asked 100 men...
Name something specific about a woman's nightie that makes it a good nightie.
 

98

SEE-THROUGH/SHEER

51

CROTCHLESS

6

SHORT/TIGHT

21

SILK/SATIN

3

OFF EASY/ON FLOOR

11


LACE

6








Name something you do when a driver cuts you off that you wouldn't do if it was a cop car.
 

98

FLIP 'EM OFF

49

NOTHING

5

HONK

19

SWERVE AT/HIT 'EM

3

YELL/CUSS

13


SPEED UP/TAIL/PASS

9








Name something a policeman wears that his wife might ask him to wear in the bedroom.
 

98

UNIFORM/HAT

46

BILLY CLUB

4

HANDCUFFS

25

BULLETPROOF VEST

3

HOLSTER/GUN

12


BADGE

8








Before they can make it to the bedroom, what might newlyweds make love on?
 

98

THE COUCH

45

AN AIRPLANE

2

THE FLOOR/RUG

31

KITCHEN COUNTERTOP

2

TABLE/AT RECEPTION

15


CAR SEAT/HOOD

3








We asked 100 single women...
Name something you'd hate to see fall out of your date's underwear.
 

98

A SOCK

43

DRUGS/'SHROOMS

5

POO/DAY-OLD TURD

24

A PHONE

2

CONDOM/SLIGHTLY USED

13


TOILET PAPER

11








If he were brave, name a kind of plastic surgery a man might tell his wife she should get.
 

98

BOOB JOB

42

VA-JAY SHRINKAGE

7

FACELIFT

22

NOSE JOB

4

LIPO

13


TUMMY TUCK

10








We asked 100 men...
Name something that's important in a girlfriend but not in a mom.
 

98

SEXY BOD/PERKY JUGS

40

COURAGE/INDEPENDENCE

3

HOT SEX/LOVES KINK

27

DUDS/BOOTY CUTTERS

2

BEAUTIFUL FACE

23


SPONTANEITY

3








We asked 100 women...
Fill in the blank: If you could have two husbands, one might be strictly for what?
 

98

BOINKING

39

COOKING

5

CLEANING/CHORES

22

HOME REPAIRS

3

MAKIN' MOOLAH

16


COMPANIONSHIP/TALK

13








We asked 100 men...
Name a place that's filled with bad girls.
 

98

STRIP JOINT

38

RED-LIGHT DISTRICT

3

BAR/BIKER BAR/CLUB

33

ALL-GIRL HIGH SCHOOL

2

JAIL/PRISON

19


LAS VEGAS

3








We asked 100 single women...
If you were shopping for a husband, what part of a man would you squeeze before you buy him?
 

98

ARMS/BULGING BICEPS

36

HIS WALLET

3

HIS CINNAMON BUNS

31

HIS HAND

2

KEN STIFFY, JR.

16


HIS ROSY CHEEKS

10








We asked 100 men...
Name something you're not too proud to beg for.
 

98

COOCHIE COOCHIE!

32

"HELP"

4

MONEY/RAISE

28

NEW CAR

3

FORGIVENESS

17


FOOD/MA'S TATERS

14








Name something a child does to convince his parents he's too sick for school.
 

98

COUGHS

29

WHINES/MOANS/CRIES

10

BARFS/FAKE PUKE

23

SAD FACE/MOPES

5

HEATS THERMOMETER

17


HOLDS HIS TUMMY

14








Name something you might judge by how good it smells.
 

97

FOOD/MILK/COFFEE

70

PERSON/MY HOOK UP

3

FLOWERS

12

SOAP

2

PERFUME

6


WINE

4








Name something that's described as sharp.
 

97

KNIFE

69

RAZOR BLADE

5

NEEDLE

8

INTELLIGENCE

3

TACK

7


PENCIL

5








Name something a woman will do with a baby or a Chihuahua.
 

97

HOLD/CUDDLE/CARRY

65

KISS

5

BABY TALK/COO

11

PET/RUB

3

FEED/BREAST-FEED

7


DRESS IN CLOTHES

6








Name something that might come out of a person's nose.
 

97

SNOT/NEST O' BOOGERS

64

A SNEEZE

2

BLOOD

12

SODA/A DRINK

2

HAIR

10


AIR/BREATH

7








If a male stripper called himself Tarzan, what might he do during his act?
 

97

SWING/ON A VINE

60

WEAR LOINCLOTH

3

YELL

15

CLIMB TREE/POLE

2

BEAT HIS CHEST

14


STRIP/SHOW BANANA

3








Name something the dog guests each did to the casket at Fido's funeral.
 

97

PEED ON IT

56

PUT PAWS ON IT

3

SNIFFED IT

22

WAGGED TAIL AT IT

3

LEFT BONE/TOY/TREAT

7


LICKED IT

6








Name an office supply you'd use to pick food out of your teeth.
 

97

PAPER CLIP

53

LETTER OPENER

8

PAPER/ENVELOPE

12

TACK/PIN

6

STAPLE

9


PEN/PENCIL

9








What would you do if a coworker kept flirting with you at work?
 

97

FLIRT BACK

36

ASK OUT ON DATE

4

TELL THEM TO STOP

29

KICK/SLAP THEM

2

IGNORE/DISTANCE

15


REPORT THEM

11








We asked 100 men...
Name a food that makes a woman look sexy when she eats it.
 

97

BANANA

35

SUCCULENT PEACH

4

STRAWBERRY

31

SPAGHETTI

3

ICE CREAM/POPSICLE

14


JUICY WIENER

10








Name a reason you'd rather be a horse than a cow.
 

97

NOT KILLED/EATEN

29

I WANNA BE RIDDEN

4

RUN FASTER

27

SMELL BETTER

2

HOT LOOKS/HAIR/BOD

18


NO UDDER/MILKING

17








We asked 100 married women...
Fill in the blank: I still love my man, even though he doesn't have a very good what?
 

97

JOB/INCOME

24

PHYSIQUE/BODY

10

PERSONALITY/'TUDE

24

HEAD OF HAIR

7

BRAIN/MEMORY

18


FASHION STYLE

14








If you dated a fireman, name something of his you might like to play with.
 

96

HIS FIRE HOSE

61

HIS DALMATIAN

4

HELMET/UNIFORM

17

THE FIRE POLE

2

HIS TRUCK/SIREN

8


SMOLDERING BOD/ROD

4








We asked 100 married men...
Name something about a chicken that might remind you of your wife.
 

96

ITS LEGS/THIGHS

51

ITS STRUT

3

ITS BREASTS

31

ITS SKIN

2

ITS WINGS/FLAPPING

6


ITS NECK

3








Name someone who tells you to lie back and relax.
 

96

DENTIST/HYGIENIST

49

MASSEUR/MASSEUSE

4

DOCTOR/GYNO

25

DOMINATING HOOKER

3

MY SPOUSE/MATE

8


MY THERAPIST/SHRINK

7








Name something that might bite you for which you would require medical attention.
 

96

SNAKE/RATTLESNAKE

48

RACCOON

2

BUG/BROWN RECLUSE

22

RAT

2

DOG

20


ALLIGATOR

2








Name something the world's smallest strip club might have only one of inside.
 

96

POLE

45

EMCEE

2

STRIPPER

37

BOUNCER

2

BATHROOM

7


STAGE

3








Name something people run across their lips.
 

96

CHAPSTICK/BALM

44

FOOD/JUICY CHERRY

2

TONGUE

26

ICE/WATER

2

LIPSTICK/GLOSS

19


FINGER

3








Instead of a bouquet, what might a stripper bride throw at her wedding?
 

96

PANTIES/G-STRING

42

CONDOMS

2

GARTER/BELT

20

HER DRESS

2

BRA/PASTIES

15


DOLLAR BILLS/$

15








What's the worst thing someone can notice about you as you walk out of a public restroom?
 

96

FLY'S OPEN

38

MESSY HAIR/SEX HAIR

3

TP STUCK ON ME

30

WET/DIRTY HANDS

3

WET SPOT ON PANTS

12


SKIRT UP/IN PANTIES

10








When the boss's door is closed for an hour, what's going on in there?
 

96

THEY'RE SLEEPING

39

CHEWING OUT/FIRING

7

MEETING/WORKING

21

ONLINE/GAMES

3

PRIVATE CALL

14


POKING/HOT SECRETARY

12








Name something a man loves to spend time with because it doesn't talk.
 

96

PET/DOG

33

BOAT

3

TV/REMOTE

28

BOOK

3

CAR/TRUCK

24


BOOZE/BEER

5








If a man swims nude in the ocean, what sea creature might mistake his manhood for food?
 

95

FISH/SHARK/JELLYFISH

80

OCTOPUS

2

TURTLE

6

DOLPHIN

2

CRAB

3


SEAL

2








Name something associated with cheerleaders.
 

95

POM-POMS

73

FOOTBALL/SPORTS

3

HOT UNIFORMS

11

DANCE/GYMNASTICS

2

BOUNCING BOOBS

3


CHEERS

3








We asked 100 women...
When you close your eyes and get a sloppy kiss, what animal does it feel like you're kissing?
 

95

DOG

72

MONKEY/APE

2

FISH

8

COW

2

HORSE

8


CAMEL

3








Name something in a bedroom you hope doesn't get broken while making whoopee.
 

95

BED/HEADBOARD

68

THE TV

2

BODIES/"DICKIE JR."

14

CONDOM/PETER PARKA

2

LAMP/LIGHTS

6


MIRRORS/OVER BED

3








Name a place a man goes for some incredible breasts and legs.
 

95

RESTAURANT/KFC

63

THE GYM

2

STRIP JOINT

19

PLASTIC SURGEON

2

BAR/CLUB

5


HOME/BEDROOM

4








Name something a woman might put in her bra.
 

95

MONEY

62

SOCKS

3

KLEENEX/T.P.

21

HER YUMMY BOSOMS

2

PHONE

4


FALSIES/PADS

3








Name something a man might name after himself.
 

95

HIS SON/DAUGHTER

61

A SANDWICH

2

HIS CAR/TRUCK

15

HIS BOAT

2

HIS DOG

11


HIS MANACONDA

4








We asked 100 married men...
Admit it -- name something of your wife's you use when she's not looking.
 

95

COMB/BRUSH

57

LOOFAH

5

NAIL CLIPPERS

12

TOOTHBRUSH

5

TWEEZERS

11


APRON

5








We asked 100 men...
Name something you'd hate to be wearing when you wake up after a wild party.
 

95

PANTIES/GIRL DUDS

56

A CONDOM/USED

2

NOT A THING

20

A LAMP SHADE

2

MY CLOTHES/SHOES

8


LIPSTICK/MAKEUP

7








Name something a pet psychologist does to make his patient feel relaxed.
 

95

PETS/SCRATCHES

54

PLAYS/TOYS

3

GIVES FOOD/TREATS

21

MUSIC/ATOMIC DOG

3

TALKS/SOOTHINGLY

8


DRUGS/PET PROZAC

6








We asked 100 men...
When the woman you're dating says she has something important to tell you, what's the first thing you think of?
 

95

SHE'S PREGNANT

53

SHE NEEDS MONEY

3

SHE'S DUMPING ME

28

SHE'S MARRIED

2

WANTS TO MARRY ME

6


MEET HER PARENTS

3








We asked 100 women...
Name something your boyfriend stops doing that makes you suspect you're about to be dumped.
 

95

CALLING/TEXTING

45

"I LOVE YOU"

6

TAKING ME OUT

17

HITTIN' MY HOO-HA

4

KISSING ME

15


HOLDING ME/HANDS

8








What's a bad plant to grow in a nudist colony?
 

95

POISON IVY/OAK

44

VENUS FLYTRAP

3

CACTUS

37

STINGING NETTLE

2

ROSE BUSH

6


THISTLE

3








We asked 100 men...
What would you do if you found out your girlfriend was posing nude for money?
 

95

ASK FOR A CUT/HALF

42

BE PROUD/BRAG

5

DUMP HER

31

GET COPIES OF PICS

5

MAKE HER BUY DINNER

7


GET UPSET/ANGRY

5








Name something you need to have if you want to open a disco.
 

95

GROOVY TUNES/DJ

35

LICENSES/PERMITS

4

DISCO BALL

35

FUNKY LIGHTS

3

MONEY

11


DANCE FLOOR

7








Name something that follows the word "boy."
 

95

BOY TOY

28

BOY WONDER

6

BOYFRIEND

27

BOY GEORGE

2

BOYHOOD

23


BOY SCOUT

9








Name something you would like Steve Harvey to give you.
 

94

MONEY/$1 MILLION

73

A NEW CAR

3

BIG HUG/JUICY KISS

6

JOKES/LAUGHS

3

ADVICE

6


A VACATION

3








We asked 100 married women...
Even though he's your man, what do you hate watching your husband do in the nude?
 

94

PEE/LAUNCH A DOODY

57

STRUT AROUND

2

BRUSH & FLOSS

17

THE DISHES

2

SHOWER

13


SHAVE

3








We asked 100 women...
Name something you're pretty good at figuring out about a man on a first date.
 

94

CHARACTER/INTENTIONS

50

HYGIENE/WASHES NADS

5

PERSONALITY/HUMOR

23

HIS NAME

3

HIS IQ

7


IF HOMIE'S RICH

6








Two men fight over a woman. What might two women fight over?
 

94

MAN/CHRIS HEMSWORTH

46

WOMAN/BEYONCE

3

CLOTHES/SHOES

31

JEWELRY/RING

2

PURSE/HANDBAG

8


MONEY

4








We asked 100 men...
Name something Popeye has that you wouldn't want.
 

94

HIS GAL, OLIVE OYL

42

ONE EYE/SQUINTY EYE

6

PIPE/SMOKING HABIT

21

CANNED SPINACH

5

TATTOOS

11


ODD/GIANT ARMS

9








Name something a church might do to encourage men to attend church on Super Bowl Sunday.
 

94

SHOW GAME/BIG TV

41

GIVE AWAY GAME TIX

2

FREE FOOD/BEER

38

SERMON ABOUT GAME

2

QUICK/EARLY SERVICE

9


TAKE BETS

2








What do chickens have that you're glad you don't?
 

94

FEATHERS

34

WINGS

7

BEAK

30

CLAWED FEET

7

THIN/DRUMSTICK LEGS

8


EGGS TO LAY

8








Name something rabbits must really find sexy about each other to mate so much.
 

94

LONG SUCKABLE EARS

31

NICE JUNK/HOT HUMP

8

SOFT COLORFUL FUR

29

HOT FACE/PINK NOSE

6

SWEET FUNKY SCENT

12


BIG BUSHY TAIL

8








Name something that would be hard to eat if you only had one tooth.
 

94

APPLES

28

CARROTS

2

CORN ON THE COB

27

SANDWICH/GYRO

2

STEAK/MEAT

27


CHEWY CANDY/GUM

8








Name the worst place to be caught in a lie.
 

94

CHURCH

25

POLICE STATION/JAIL

10

JOB/INTERVIEW

24

PARENTS' HOUSE

2

COURT/WITNESS STAND

18


HOME/IN BED

15








Give me a word that rhymes with "lucky."
 

93

DUCKY

54

MUCKY

6

PLUCKY

15

SUCKY

3

BUCKY

8


YUCKY

7








Name something a couple might decide to get that starts with the letter "D."
 

93

DIVORCE

41

DILDO

4

DOG

32

DISHWASHER

3

DIAMOND

8


DINNER

5








We asked 100 women...
Name some information you would tell your best friend for her own good.
 

93

HER MAN'S A HO/JERK

34

SLIM DOWN, PORKY!

8

SMELLS/BUTT BREATH

20

QUIT BOOZING, LUSH!

5

FASH'N POLICE COMING

14


FOOD-FILLED TEETH

12








When you were a baby, you loved your pacifier. What do you love sucking on now?
 

92

CANDY/LOLLIPOPS

65

LEMONS/LIMES

3

HANDFUL O' HOOTERS

12

ICE CUBES

2

POPSICLES/ICE CREAM

7


BEER/BOTTLE

3








Name something a lonely guy likes to squeeze because it feels like a woman.
 

92

PILLOWS

59

DOLL/BLOW-UP

4

MELONS

13

ORANGES

2

BALLOONS

9


BALL/STRESS BALL

5








We asked 100 women...
What would you do if a man asked you when you were expecting your baby and you weren't pregnant?
 

92

"I'M NOT!"/CUSS OUT

48

DIRTY LOOK/FROWN

6

HIT/SLAP HIM

16

MAKE UP A DUE DATE

5

WALK AWAY

9


CRY

8








Name something specific grandpa would hate to find out grandma did with his toupee.
 

92

CLEANED HOUSE

45

WIPED HER BUTT

2

THREW IT AWAY

21

GAVE TO DOG/TO WEAR

2

WASHED IT

19


DROPPED IN TOILET

3








Name something that would be hard to do if you only had one lip instead of two.
 

92

KISS

42

TALK

5

WHISTLE

23

SUCK

4

DRINK

9


EAT/CHEW

9








We asked 100 married people...
Name a nice four-letter word you call your spouse.
 

92

BABE/BABY

40

BOBO

2

LOVE

34

CUTE

2

DEAR

12


DORK

2








Name the occupation of someone who could cut you.
 

92

SURGEON/DR.

39

KNIFE THROWER

3

BUTCHER

22

SPORTS COACH

2

BARBER/HAIRDRESSER

21


CHEF/COOK

5








We asked 100 men...
Name a place you might run into your boss where you'd both agree to keep it a secret.
 

91

STRIP JOINT

56

EATERY/WAFFLE HOUSE

5

BAR/CLUB

15

THE BATHROOM/STALL

2

PORN PALACE

7


MS. KITTY'S CATHOUSE

6








We asked 100 men...
Fill in the blank: Dear God, please don't let me die in the middle of what?
 

91

SEX/WITH MY PILLOW

53

DESERT/NEW MEXICO

2

PEEING/A ROUGH POO

15

THE STREET/ROAD

2

TRAFFIC/DRIVING

12


A BIG GAME

7








Name something real housewives throw when they are drunk.
 

91

THEIR DRINK

45

A PARTY/ORGY

4

TANTRUM/INSULTS

22

HEELS/SHOES

S4

DISHES

10


BOTTLES

6








Name a reason you'd have to call 911 when you're making love.
 

91

INJURY/BROKE WEENIE

38

LOVER CROAKED

4

HEART ATTACK

34

LOST HANDCUFF KEY

3

STUCK TOGETHER

7


HOUSE/BED ON FIRE

5








Name a part of someone that some might say is as big as an elephant.
 

91

BADONK

31

TALLYWACKER

6

EARS

22

BRAIN/MEMORY

4

NOSE

21


EGO

7








Name something big that most women would like to have.
 

91

HOUSE

29

BEYONCE'S BUTT

8

DOUBLE G HOOTERS

23

CAR/SUV

5

BANK ACCOUNT

14


RING/DIAMONDS

12








Fill in the blank: You'd be shocked if grandma ever announced to the family, "I'm" what?
 

90

PREGNANT

48

ENGAGED

2

GAY/CRAVING COOCH

30

OUTTA HERE/TRAVEL'G

2

A MAN/NAMED ELMER

6


DYING

2








Name something dogs tinkle on that would be weird to see a person tinkle on.
 

90

FIRE HYDRANT

41

POLE/LAMPPOST

5

TREE/BUSH

24

TIRE

5

GRASS/MY LAWN

9


CHAIR/FURNITURE

6








Name a word that rhymes with "soup."
 

90

POOP

36

HOOP

4

COUPE/COOP

25

GROUP

3

LOOP

17


TROOP

5








We asked 100 men...
Name a state your wife's behind is as big as.
 

90

TEXAS

29

OHIO

5

RHODE ISLAND

25

ALASKA

4

CALIFORNIA

19


FLORIDA

8








Name someone you wish were alive and all their impersonators were dead.
 

89

ELVIS

67

MICHAEL JACKSON

4

ROBIN WILLIAMS

6

WINSTON CHURCHILL

3

ABRAHAM LINCOLN

5


CHARLIE CHAPLIN

4








Name an occupation for which you have to have good moves.
 

89

PRO DANCER/BALLET

58

SALES/MARKETING

3

PRO SPORTS

15

WAITER

2

STRIPPER

8


NINJA

3








Name a place it would just be wrong for a woman to be seen wearing a thong.
 

89

CHURCH/NUNNERY

53

BUFFET/RESTAURANT

3

STORE/MALL

17

FAMILY REUNION

2

WORK/OFFICE

9


WEDDING

5








Name a reason you can't sit down.
 

89

SORE/PAIN/'RHOIDS

52

TOO BUSY/WORKING

4

NO SEATS

13

PANTS TOO TIGHT

3

GOTTA PEE/LAY CABLE

9


NERVOUS/HYPER

8








Name something some women used to do with their dolls that now they do with their men.
 

89

DRESS/UNDRESS

51

PLAY/HOUSE

5

KISS/CUDDLE

14

BATHE

4

FIX HAIR

8


TALK/BOSS AROUND

7








If grandpa got a divorce, where might he go to look for a new wife?
 

89

SENIOR HOME/CTR.

45

BINGO PARLOR

7

WEB/HOTGEEZER.COM

12

STORE/MALL

6

CHURCH

10


BAR

9








Fill in the blank: Old enough to what?
 

89

KNOW BETTER

43

DRIVE

3

DRINK/BEER

31

VOTE

3

DIE

6


CARE/NOT CARE

3








What's the most embarrassing thing a cop could find in the trunk of your car?
 

89

KINKY TOYS/DOLL

36

DRUGS

5

PANTIES/DIRTY DUDS

18

PORN

5

BODY/MY DEAD UNCLE

16


CONDOMS/X-SMALL

9








Santa brings coal to naughty children. What might the Easter Bunny bring to them?
 

89

ROTTEN EGGS

35

ROCKS/STONES

8

HIS POOP

23

BAD/DIET CANDY

5

GRASS

9


VEGGIES/CARROT

9








Besides hay, name something a farmer and his wife might have a romp in.
 

89

FIELDS/COW PASTURE

34

ON THE TRACTOR

4

THEIR BED

22

PICKUP TRUCK

4

BARN/HORSE STABLE

20


MUD/PIG PEN

5








If grandpa lost his glasses, what might he squeeze thinking is grandma's behind?
 

88

PILLOW/SOFA

57

HER LEG/THIGHS

6

THE DOG/CAT

7

HER SAGGY BOOBS

4

SOMEONE ELSE/A NUN

7


ORANGE/FRUIT

7








We asked 100 men...
Fill in the blank: Every girl I meet tells me I'm what?
 

88

HOT/HANDSOME

52

OLD

4

FUNNY/FUN

14

BRAINY/A NERD

3

NICE

11


A HARD WORKER

4








Name something a woman with a great body might also have that's not so great.
 

88

PERSONALITY/'TUDE

51

A MAN/DOUCHEY ONE

4

PEA-BRAIN

12

HEALTH/OOZING RASH

3

FACE OF A WARTHOG

12


NASTY MANGLED FEET

6








We asked 100 women...
Name something you're sorry to say no man has never bought.
 

88

JEWELRY/RING

50

PERFUME

5

CAR

17

HOME/MY OWN ISLAND

3

LINGERIE/CROTCHLESS

7


TRIP/TO PARIS

6








If your right hand was broken, name something you'd have to start doing with your left.
 

88

WRITING

46

WIPING MY BOOTY

4

EATING

16

PUTTING ON MAKEUP

3

WASHING DISHES

13


DRIVING

6








Name an occasion that makes a guy very nervous.
 

88

WEDDING DAY

44

PROPOSING

3

DATE/BLIND DATE

26

JOB INTERVIEW

3

MEETING HER FAMILY

7


VALENTINE'S DAY

5








Fill in the blank: If a woman meets a guy on FarmersOnly.com, he might be too attached to his what?
 

88

TRACTOR/PLOW

44

GOATS

6

COWS

19

SHEEP

4

HORSES

8


FARM/LAND

7








Name something spring breakers do in Florida that grandpa might like to join in on.
 

88

DRINK/BEER PONG

42

SUNBATHE

5

SWIM/SKINNY-DIP

20

WATCH HOT CHICKS

4

SPORTS/FISHING

10


DANCE

7








Oh no -- you meant to send naked pictures to your beloved. But they accidentally went to who?
 

88

PARENTS

39

KIDS

4

BOSS/COWORKER

23

EX

4

FRIEND

9


BROTHER/SISTER

9








Name a specific place where you hate to see couples making out.
 

88

RESTAURANT

24

STORE/MALL

11

MOVIES/THEATER

19

CAR/MY BACK SEAT

3

PARK/PLAYGROUND

16


CHURCH

15








Name a kind of place that might have mirrors installed on the ceiling.
 

87

HOTEL/MOTEL

45

FUN HOUSE

7

HOME/BEDROOM

11

STORE/DRESS'G ROOM

6

STRIP JOINT

9


BAR/CLUB

9








Name something people ride that isn't as easy as riding a bike.
 

87

UNICYCLE

29

BULL/MECHANICAL

5

MOTORCYCLE/SCOOTER

25

CAMEL

3

SKATEBOARD

13


HORSE

12








Name something men do just like a bear.
 

87

SLEEP/SNORE

25

EAT

10

GROWL/ROAR

22

POOP/PEE/IN WOODS

7

SCRATCH

12


HUG/CUDDLE

11








Name something in the house that a woman might use to murder her husband.
 

86

KNIFE

56

ICE PICK

3

GUN

15

PILLS

3

POISON

5


POT/PAN

4








Name something a woman hopes doesn't break right before going out on a big date.
 

86

SHOE/HEEL

40

HAIR DRYER

3

FINGERNAIL

30

HER WATER

3

BRA

6


CAR

4








Name a part of your lover's body you'd like to eat a chocolate mold of.
 

86

BOOBS/NIPS/PECS

40

DOODYMAKER

6

WONDER DOWN UNDER

18

BEATING HEART

4

HOT THICK LIPS

11


HANDS/FINGERS

7








Name a bakery product people use when referring to parts of their body.
 

86

BUNS

36

DONUT

7

MUFFIN/TOP

22

BREAD/BASKET

4

ROLLS

9


DOUGH

8








Name something some people are desperate to get out of.
 

85

DEBT/TAXES

45

JURY DUTY

5

WORK/JOB

14

BAD/BLIND DATE

3

MARRIAGE/RELA'SHIP

11


JAIL

7








We asked 100 women...
Name something you'd have to get used to if you married a pirate.
 

85

HIS HOOK/ONE HAND

36

HIS SCRUFFY BEARD

6

HIS PEG LEG

15

HIS PARROT

6

HIS EYE PATCH

13


THE SEA/SAILING

9








Name something doctors should have in their waiting room to make the wait more fun.
 

85

GAMES/VIDEO GAMES

25

COMPUTER/INTERNET

8

TV/MOVIES

18

FOOD/MILKSHAKE

5

OPEN BAR

15


MAGAZINES/PLAYBOY

14








When a man is on the phone with his wife, what does she start talking about that would make him pretend the call is breaking up?
 

85

CHORES/REPAIRS

21

HIS IN-LAWS

10

MONEY

19

THEIR CHILDREN

5

WHERE R U/TIME HOME?

17


SHOP'G/GO TO STORE

13








Name a state whose people have a lot of attitude.
 

84

NEW YORK

45

MICHIGAN

3

CALIFORNIA

23

TEXAS

3

NEW JERSEY

7


GEORGIA

3








Name something your neighbors can't seem to do without making a lot of noise.
 

84

HAVE A PARTY

24

FIGHT/ARGUE

9

YARD WORK

23

VACUUM/CLEAN

6

"SUGAR THE COOKIE"

11


COME & GO/DRIVE OFF

11








Name something a smuggler hides things in.
 

84

LUGGAGE/BAG/POUCH

23

A CAVE

3

CLOTHES/SHOES

20

BOX/CRATE

3

BODY/POOP CHUTE

19


CAR/TIRE/TRUNK

16








We asked 100 men...
Name something a woman does that shows she likes you.
 

84

SMILES

23

KISSES ME

7

PLAYS WITH HAIR

20

COOKS DINNER

6

WINKS/BATS EYELASHES

19


DRESSES SEXY

9








Fill in the blank: A woman might knock a man out with her what?
 

84

PURSE/HANDBAG

21

SHOES/STILETTOS

7

FIST/HAND

21

SHAPELY BADONK

4

BEAUTY

18


SWEATER PUPPIES

13








Name something that might be strong and silent.
 

83

PERSON/MUTE BOXER

50

STEEL/METAL

4

ANIMAL/TIGER

14

A TREE

3

FARTS

8


A ROCK

4








Name something specific that you turn over.
 

83

PANCAKES

44

CAR/ENGINE

5

HOT SLOBBERY PILLOW

12

EGGS

5

MATTRESS

9


PAGES OF BOOK

8








Name a sea creature that a scuba diver wouldn't want to look at him romantically.
 

83

SHARK

36

SQUID

5

OCTOPUS

25

EEL

5

WHALE

7


DOLPHIN

5








Name a place where you see a lot of nervous people.
 

83

DOCTOR/DENTIST OFC.

35

IRS/TAX OFFICE

4

COURTHOUSE

24

POLICE STATION/JAIL

3

HOSPITAL/E.R.

11


JOB INTERVIEW/WORK

6








We asked 100 men...
Name something a dog can do that you can't.
 

82

LICK SELF/BUTT

42

SCRATCH NECK W/ LEG

6

SLEEP ALL DAY

13

WALK ON ALL FOURS

6

RUN FAST

9


BARK

6








Name something a woman gets for herself because she's tired of waiting for a man to do it.
 

82

JEWELRY/RING

39

CANDY/CHOCOLATE

4

FLOWERS

12

CAR

4

CLOTHES/SHOES

12


VIBRATOR/BIG "O"

11








Give me the name of an expensive car that a man might also name one of his children.
 

82

MERCEDES

38

JAGUAR

3

PORSCHE

20

BENTLEY

3

LEXUS

13


FERRARI

5








We asked 100 married men...
Name something you like to watch your wife do.
 

82

COOK

27

BEND OVER

5

DRESS/UNDRESS

19

CLEAN

4

SLEEP

14


SHOWER

13








Name something that some men like little and some like big.
 

82

KNOCKERS/NIPPLES

24

BUTTS

10

CARS/TRUCKS

18

DOGS

3

TINY GALS/BIG MAMAS

14


FOOD/PORTIONS

13








If your dog understood you, what would it not want to hear you talking about?
 

81

VET/SNIP SNIP

38

POOP/SCOOPING

3

SEX/FAVE POSITION

25

MY LOVE OF CATS

3

BATH TIME

8


ANOTHER DOG

4








Name something it would be mean to put in someone's shoe.
 

81

STEAMING DOODY

34

BUG/TARANTULA

5

A TACK

15

GRAVEL/ROCKS

3

GUM

12


SUPER GLUE

12








Name something from her first wedding a bride might use again for her second.
 

81

DRESS/VEIL

32

BRIDESMAIDS

6

SHOES

17

CAKE TOPPER

4

GARTER BELT

12


THE RING/JEWELRY

10








Fill in the blank: A wife who wants to get her husband's attention should stand in front of the TV holding what?
 

81

BEER/BOOZE

22

HER EAGER JUGS/BOD

9

HER CLOTHES/UNDIES

17

WEAPON/AXE

5

THE REMOTE

15


FOOD/WINGS

13








Young lovers put whipped cream on each other. What does an old couple put on each other?
 

80

BENGAY/MED OINTMENT

48

ICE CREAM

3

COVERS/BLANKET

11

CHOCOLATE

3

CLOTHES

11


LOTION/ANTI-WRINKLE

4








Name something an 80-year-old man might bring with him on a date with a 25-year-old.
 

80

VIAGRA/HIS MEDS

42

OXYGEN

4

MONEY/WALLET

13

EYEGLASSES

4

FLOWERS

11


HIS CANE/WALKER

6








Name something a man would never get criticized for doing in public but a woman would.
 

80

GOING SHIRTLESS

37

SCRATCH'G/THE GOODS

5

TAKING A SQUIRT

22

BOOZING/KEG STAND

4

CUSS/YELL/ARGUE

6


FLIRTING/CATCALLS

6








Name something it only takes two minutes to do.
 

80

BRUSH MY TEETH

34

COOK/MICROWAVE

5

PEE/SNAP A YAM

14

SHAVE

4

NOONER/QUICKIE

12


EAT/A SNACK

11








Name something that gets pulled off.
 

79

MY PANTIES/CLOTHES

52

STUNT/PRANK

3

BAND-AID/BANDAGE

12

HAIR/BODY HAIR

3

ROBBERY/SCAM

6


LABEL/TAG

3








Name an expression with the word "bottom" in it.
 

79

BOTTOMS UP

38

BOTTOM LINE

6

ROCK-BOTTOM

15

BOTTOM OUT

5

BOTTOM-FEEDER

8


...OF THE BARREL

7








Name a place you've learned to keep your mouth shut if you want to stay out of trouble.
 

76

WORK

23

SCHOOL

10

CHURCH

13

POLICE STATION/JAIL

7

COURT

13


HOME/BEDROOM

10








Besides "hooters," give me another word or words for breasts that a bar might call itself.
 

75

JUGS

18

TA-TAS

9

BOOBS/BOOBIES

15

TWIN PEAKS

7

KNOCKERS

15


MELONS

11








Give me a word starting with "H" a man might use to describe his wife.
 

72

HOT/HOTTIE

31

HONEST

7

HAPPY

12

HORNY

5

HONEY

9


HAG

8








Name something that gives a woman a lift.
 

71

A GOOD BRA

28

A COMPLIMENT

7

FOOD/SWEETS

15

SPA DAY

5

FLOWERS

8


HOOKER HEELS

8








After she marries him, name a specific activity a woman would hate to find out her man likes to do in the nude.
 

71

EXERCISE/JOG

15

CLEAN HOUSE

9

COOK/FRY CHICKEN

14

DANCE

8

WATCH TV/JUDGE JUDY

13


YARD WORK/GARDEN

12








Name something you do to your dog that you wouldn't do to your best friend.
 

69

PET/RUB BELLY

26

MEDICAL STUFF/NEUTER

7

BATHE/GROOM THEM

11

FEED HIM/ON FLOOR

7

WALK THEM/ON A LEASH

10


KISS/LET LICK ME

8








A kid might say, "I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus. And I saw daddy kissing" who?
 

69

MRS. CLAUS

22

THE SITTER/NANNY

7

MOMMY

17

RUDOLPH/REINDEER

6

THE NEIGHBOR

9


AN ELF

8








Name a state where you see lots of guys with mullet haircuts.
 

69

ALABAMA

21

TEXAS

8

CALIFORNIA

12

NEW YORK

5

ARKANSAS

12


TENNESSEE

11








Fill in the blank: Most men have learned to never come between a woman and her what?
 

68

CHILDREN

23

HAIR/APPOINTMENT

5

MOM/PARENTS

17

DOG/KITTY

5

SHOES/CLOTHES

12


CHOCOLATE/SWEETS

6








Name someone who's a lot less intimidating if you picture them in just their underwear.
 

68

MY BOSS

23

DAD

5

PRESIDENT/OBAMA

17

SPOUSE/MATE

4

TEACHER

10


POLICE OFFICER

9








Name something you'd hate to discover you slept on top of all night long.
 

68

BUGS/SPIDERS

17

IRONED/DIRTY CLOTHES

6

PEE/POO

16

MY GLASSES

6

PET/BOA CONSTRICTOR

12


PERSON/SOMEONE UGLY

11








Name something that gets pulled.
 

67

HAIR

18

TAFFY

5

PORK

16

MY FINGER

4

TEETH

16


WAGON

8








Name something people swap.
 

67

CLOTHES/SHOES

16

BOOKS

8

PHONE NUMBERS

14

RECIPES

6

STORIES/GOSSIP

13


SPIT/GERMS

10








Keeping it clean, name another word or expression for having sex.
 

66

MAKING LOVE

35

NOOKIE

4

DOING IT

10

ROLL IN THE HAY

3

MAKING WHOOPEE

8


INTERCOURSE

6








Name something of yours you'd consider selling if the price were right.
 

65

MY CAR/TRUCK

31

RECORDS/CDS/DVDS

5

MY HOUSE

13

MY BOD/TIGHT BOOTY

4

JEWELRY/WED'G RING

7


MY COMPUTER/LAPTOP

5








Name something really old guys wear that makes you laugh.
 

65

SUSPENDERS

20

HATS

7

HAIRPIECES

14

BOW TIES

5

SOCKS W/ SANDALS

10


PANTS TOO HIGH

9








Name a woman who has curve appeal.
 

65

KIM KARDASHIAN

15

MARILYN MONROE

7

BEYONCE

14

SHAKIRA

4

JENNIFER LOPEZ

13


SOFIA VERGARA

12








Name something that's harder to do when your hands are huge.
 

64

THREAD NEEDLE/SEW

22

BUTTON SHIRT

5

DIAL/TYPE/TEXT

16

GUITAR/INSTRUMENT

4

TIE SHOE/KNOT

9


FIX/CLASP JEWELRY

8








We asked 100 married women...
Name an animal your man looks like when he runs.
 

63

APE/MONKEY

14

CHEETAH

9

TIGER

12

HIPPOPOTAMUS

8

HORSE

11


LEOPARD

9








Name something that starts with the word "tax."
 

62

TAXIDERMY

20

TAX EVASION

5

TAXI/TAXICAB

17

TAXPAYER

5

TAX BREAK

9


TAX REFUND

6








Name a TV host who should be on everybody's "best dressed" list.
 

62

STEVE HARVEY

18

PAT SAJAK

4

JAY LENO

15

OPRAH WINFREY

4

RYAN SEACREST

12


ALEX TREBEK

9








If you designed your own coffin, name something you might put in it just in case.
 

59

PHONE

26

BIBLE

4

TOOLS/SHOVEL

11

MONEY

4

OXYGEN/MASK

9


BOOZE/BEER

5








Whipped cream might be fun, but name something you would not want your mate spreading all over your body.
 

58

PEANUT BUTTER

17

JELLY

6

HONEY

14

HOT SAUCE/TOBASCO

4

BUTTER

9


CHOCOLATE/HOT FUDGE

8








Name something you'd have to be dead to sleep through.
 

54

EARTHQUAKE

15

SNORING

7

TORNADO

10

EXPLOSION/BOMB

6

SEX

8


FIRE/ALARM

8








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